[Editor’s Note: The Pointless is the Pointer’s annual satirical article. Pointless stories should not be taken seriously on April Fool’s Day or any other.] Nestlé’s CEO Mark Schneider announced in a press conference last Thursday that the company will be returning all their water supply back to the springs and groundwater wells on Feb. 23, 2023. Billions of gallons of ... Read More »
[A Note from the Editor: The Pointless is the Pointer’s annual satirical article. No information here has any intended basis on existing fact.] The debate of ethicality regarding plasma donations for money has circled around for some time now, especially in places that are abundant in college students who need the money after funneling all their money into the education ... Read More »
[A Note from the Editor: The Pointless is the Pointer’s annual satirical article. No information here has any intended basis on existing fact.] 1. Cincinnati Bengals – Quarterback Joe Burrow The Bengals make the safe pick here that any team (outside of the Browns, maybe) wouldn’t mess up. Similarly, they take a quarterback that only the Browns could ruin ... Read More »
[A Note from the Editor: The Pointless is the Pointer’s annual satirical article. No information here has any intended basis on existing fact.] Despite earlier statements, the International Olympics Committee will continue ahead with the 2020 Summer Olympics as originally scheduled – virtually! As the spread of the COVID-19 virus has forced world governments to enact social distancing regulations for ... Read More »
Sport: Sleeping Year: Senior Major: Psychology Hometown: Miami, FL How long have you been sleeping competitively? I’ve been sleeping competitively since my freshman year in high school. I always slept about 12-14 hours a day, I just decided to start competing against my classmates. No one could sleep as long as me. That’s how I knew this was my passion. ... Read More »
[A Note from the Editor: The Pointless is the Pointer’s annual satirical article. No information here has any intended basis on existing fact.] By Missy Rona As the Coronavirus spreads throughout America, only businesses considered essential are permitted to stay open. However, what makes a business essential? The Merriam-Webster Dictionary defines the word “essential” as something being of “the utmost ... Read More »
[A Note from the Editor: The Pointless is the Pointer’s annual satirical article. No information here has any intended basis on existing fact.] Following the reopening of the DeBot Dining Center, Chancellor Bernie Patterson proudly invited world-famous chef Gordon Ramsay to check out the food. Ramsay is not only famous for his restaurants all over the world but also for ... Read More »
[A Note from the Editor: The Pointless is the Pointer’s annual satirical article. No information here has any intended basis on existing fact.] Multiple professional sports are transitioning to an online format after all sporting events were officially cancelled until 2021 due to the Coronavirus outbreak. The NBA, MLB, and PGA will begin experimenting with the idea of using the ... Read More »
[A Note from the Editor: The Pointless is the Pointer’s annual satirical article. No information here has any intended basis on existing fact.] The city of Stevens Point may be experiencing a major paradigm shift. For years, the urban metropolis of Stevens Point has been attracting venture capitalists, technology innovators and prominent Instagram influencers alike. Now boasting the largest population ... Read More »
[A Note from the Editor: The Pointless is the Pointer’s annual satirical article. No information here has any intended basis on existing fact.] Jenny Sleepers won the annual International Sleeping Championship in Sydney, Australia Saturday, March 28 in a nail biter and took home $3 million. Sleepers barely edged out Veronica Nappingstein sleeping for a new world record of 34 ... Read More »
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